How can I choose the right school for my child? And what if I live in a community with only one school, how can I make it work for my child?
Answer by Rabbi Chaim Dovid Kagan – Dean of Bais Chaya Mushka High School in Monsey, New York:
Choosing the right school for your child has no specific formula as every child is unique and has their own needs. That said, there are some steps you can take to ensure you make an informed choice.
Firstly, lay out all your options and carefully research each one. Gather as much information as possible about each school. If feasible, visiting the schools in person can provide valuable insights. During these visits, speak to the principals and observe the environment firsthand. Additionally, reaching out to other parents who have or had students in the school for their perspectives can offer valuable insights.
When assessing schools, prioritize those that demonstrate a genuine focus on each child’s individual needs. A school that places the student’s well-being above rigid institutional systems will likely be a better fit. While every school has its structure, this structure must serve the students rather than the other way around.
Recognize your child’s unique requirements, for example, whether they need special assistance in a particular area or thrive on more independence. Ensure that the school is equipped to support their diverse needs, whether through specialized programs or a stimulating curriculum. Look for evidence of the school’s effectiveness in meeting these needs, such as clear outcomes and a proven track record.
Regarding Yiddishkeit and Chassidishkeit, look for a school that inspires students to grow. The school should have a focus on making Yiddishkeit beloved and something the students want to be part of and identify with strongly.
If boarding is necessary, prioritize schools that provide a safe, nurturing environment conducive to out-of-town students’ needs.
In situations where there’s only one school option in your area, and sending your child out of town or homeschooling them are not viable options, consider becoming involved in the parent community. Try to identify what is missing from the school and to make up for what is missing.
With a positive and helpful attitude, you can positively influence the school and offer your help to contribute to the school’s success. Please work with the school to help them help your child. If Chassidishkeit or yomei depagra are what’s missing, extend effort in making sure your child receives them in extra-curricular activities. Consider including other students in these extra-curricular activities so your child does not feel socially alone.
Choosing a school for your child is not a simple process, but keeping these points in mind can make the process go more smoothly for you and your child.
